18.“Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s just not worth the jail time.” 19.“Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit!! So proud of myself. It was a scarf. But still, let’s be positive here!” 20.“I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll...
These funny quotes and hilarious sayings will make you laugh. Read and share these funny quotes from famous comedians, actors, authors, TV shows, and movies. There’s just something about getting a good laugh in that can make your day a million times better. If you’re looking forfunny qu...
There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature. —Jane Austen 104 God Funny Quotes Let me remind you that this is God's universe, and He is doing things His way. You may think you have a b...
- Yan: I'll spend all my life in jail! And when I leave prison I will help all people in need! - Katarina: So... It's just what you have to say?! - Yan: What the hell do you want me to do!!? - Katarina: When you do something bad... YOU HAVE TO SAY "SORRY! "...
Facebook resembles a jail since you write on its wall. I wouldn’t need Facebook if there was a website that just told me whether or not my exes got fat. I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status. My cat ate my mouse. ...
"Justin, you have no idea what you're in for. I'm sure it's great to have 60 million followers on Twitter, but the only place people will be following you in jail is into the shower." Martha Stewart 148 votes 12 “Tonight we’re going to do what his parents and the legal ...
SNL Weekend Update quotes: The famous SNL bloopers are compiled into this list to make your day better. There have been numerous SNL hosts, and this list ...
ByNaveen Arora OnFebruary 29, 2024 InCaptions,Influencers,Miscellaneous,Quotes These Inky Johnson quotes inspire us, remind us that expectations should never exceed your effort, that at times we need to pause and look back and understand the things around us. You can also take a look at these...
I think that it's so powerful for me to go see someone like Bridget Everett at Joe's Pub and watch her weave her songs in and out of these funny, tragic stories - you can talk and sing and it's not this horrible offense, you're going to get thrown in artistic jail. —Kathleen ...
9 Death By Electrical Engineering Three guys go down to Vegas one night, get drunk and wake up in jail. They find out that they’re to be executed for their crimes but none of them can remember what they have done. The first one is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if he...