Twain calls the story as long and tedious as it should be useless to me and leaves abruptly before Wheeler can continue his narrative about Smiley's "yaller one-eyed cow that didn't have no tail only just a short stump like a bannanner." Wheeler tells his story in complete deadpan: "...
It was 'lection day, and I was just about to go and vote myself if I warn't too drunk to get there; but when they told me there was a State in this country where they'd let that nigger vote, I drawed out. I says I'll never vote agin. Them's the very words I said; they...