He turns off his phone so he won't be interrupted. About 30 minutes later, the lazy brother gets into a head-on collision in the intersection by the grocery store. His vital signs are fading; he's unconscious and barely moving. An ambulance picks him up and rushes him to the hospital...
My friend gave birth in the car on the way to the hospital Her husband named the kid Carson. Ya know, I was supposed to be a doctor. But I just didn’t have the patience. How do you cheer up the patients at the vegetable hospital?
I’m going to take you right down to the private hospital and have you admitted for a couple of days of rest. I know the food is good there, and I’ve already spoken to the Matron and the Hospital chef and I’ve paid the bill. 2nd year –‘Listen, sweetie, I don’t like the ...
Get in the holiday spirit with these funny Christmas jokes for kids and adults. We have punny one-liners and even short quips about Santa, elves and reindeer.
To cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up. Saturday’s child works hard for a living. Saturn day. (Samedi in French). Saturday morning still has a special feeling for Will and Guy – it’s sports day, quickly finish the chores and then watch our favorite sport. ...
An English man, Irishman and a Scottishman are sitting in a pub full of people. The Englishman says, “The pubs in England are the best. You can buy one drink and get a second one free”. Everyone in the pub agreed and gave a big cheer. The Scottishman says,”..yeah. That’s ...
The guy says "I'm waiting to get paid." The CEO says "OK, how much do you get paid in a week?" The guy says "About $300." The CEO gives the guy $1200, and says "Now go away and never come back!" The guy walks away. The CEO says "Will someone please tell me wh...
of anger, and full of disappointment. Their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump(倾倒)it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personal. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You’ll be happy at...
19My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?” 20Never break someone’s heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have ...
a However, the other skydivers sitting around me were very relaxed. They were telling jokes to each other and drinking juice. Some of them offered me candies and gum to cheer me up. Can you imagine someone drinking orange juice just before jumping from thirteen thousand feet (英尺)?[transla...