He tried them on and found he could only get them to go as far as his kneecaps. "Hell," he said. I can't get into your panties!" She replied, "That's right, and that's the way it's going to stay until your attitude changes." joke about men marriage joke panties honeymoon ...
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment? He wanted to transcend dental medication. Anaesthetist : Dwayne is recovering from surgery in St Peter’s, Chertsey, UK, having had a local anesthetic when a nurse asks him how he’s feeling. ‘I...
A woman went to her doctor's clinic. She was seen by one of the doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. One of the younger doctors stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained. She had her sit down...
He lost both his legs above the knee and 4 inches of his small intestines. He had to learn the hard way. He seemed like a pretty nice guy, not part of that wheelchair wheelie crowd. So, wanted to do a good deed and started thinking. Maybe I could set him up with my sister. ...
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Because their knee grows. How many Alzheimers patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side. What's the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler? Usain Bolt can finish a race. Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes. ...
After the injury, the star ofA Quiet Placewas "rushed to the hospital" but ultimately headed back to the U.S. for surgery. At one point, Krasinski pointed to his leg and joked, "This is all robotic. I'm a Transformer now."
Colleen blushed, then took his hand and put it on her knee. Then he blushed. The two turned once again to gaze at the meadow before Colleen spoke again. "Another penny for your thoughts, Paddy." The young man glanced down with a furled brow. "My thoughts are a wee bit more serious...
When I got up, I noticed Ihad a rock embedded in my knee and my friend was pointing & laughing at me. So I dug the rock out and whipped it at him- hitting him right in the forehead. That was the only time I ever passed a kid knee stone. ...
“other people were knee-slapping. everyone was processing it in their own way, on their own time.” and after louis c.k. put up the set for sale on his site, fangirls came out of the woodwork—lena dunham later tweeted about the set, “surer than ever about art’s job #tig #...