"Today, you’re 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!" - Dave Barry" “By the time you’re 80 years old you’ve learned everything. You only have to remember it.” - George Burns "I can honestly say I love getting older. Then again, I never put ...
What did the girl say after getting the same birthday card 3 years in a row with a picture of a sweater on it? What do you eat after smoking weed and banging? What's a four letter word in Italian for goodbye? What is Sean Connery's favorite blog? Why did the man become a...
Sort By You don’t get smarter when you become older. There just aren’t so many stupid things left that you haven’t done yet. Thank you, grandpa. The violin you gave me for my last birthday already brought me a lot of money. Really? You play so well? Not at all. But mom and...
Jokes For KidsJoke Generator If you're looking for some harmless jokes for kids of all ages, you've come to the right place. Sort ByRandom Quizzesyou may like: Spelling TestsNew Spelling Bee General Knowledge QuizDefeat This General Knowledge Test!
‘I’ve just done sex education in school today, Dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before my sixteenth birthday, my boyfriend will die!’ I put down my paper: ‘Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will.’ How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Cabbie: ‘There’s more, he had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out.’ ...
Bored Panda 35 Jokes About Adulting That May Comfort You Knowing You’re Not Alone Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 167points x Facebook Pinterest Twitter Funny, Jokes3 months ago 35 Jokes About Adulting That May Comfort You Knowing You’re Not Alone ...
As they were getting older, they had an argument about whether people play football in heaven. So they agreed that whoever dies first will come back in a dream and let the other one know if they […] Read More Next Page » Recent Jokes Second grade teacher was having trouble with ...
5 - I'd like to say something nice about you as it's your birthday. Why don't you? Because I can...More ›› 6 - First boy: Are you having a party for your birthday? Second boy: No, I'm having a witch do. Fi...More ›› ...
It’s not about age, it’s about attitude. When I was a child my family was so poor that the only thing I got on my birthday was a year older. It’s my wife’s birthday tomorrow. Last week I asked her what she wanted as a present. “Oh, I don’t know”, she said. “Just...