“If at first you don’t succeed,try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”~W. C. Fields “Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.” ~Anonymous “One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.”~George Carlin...
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About a week later, Maria came to Rocco saying, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?” “Well, I doubt it, but I’ll email her, just to be sure.” So Rocco sat down and wrote this...
The Funniest One-Liners About Yourself Ground Picture/Shutterstock I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus, a slice of lemon. And a shot of tequila. I don't have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock-hard abs. ...
I believe - to the best of my recollection, anyway - that I soon made the classic error of moving from margaritas to actual shots of straight tequila. It does make it easier to meet new people. — Anthony Bourdain 29 I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved. — George...
” Perhaps you’re bewildered by the fact that a side dish is talking to you. Don’t over-think it. Believe what the creamy, dreamy yams tell you. They have your best interest at heart. And I’m not just saying this because I’m the high priest of the sweet potato sex cult. ...
Sneaking in a little nap since you have a quiet house for the first time in months is not frowned upon. Just saying. School Car Line Meme Don’t forget about the car line! This car rider line meme can be felt by any parent doing back to school pick up or drop off. ...
LaffGaffis all about really funny jokes and anything that makes us laugh – we believe that laughter makes the world go round.The world would be a much duller place without a sense of humor, wouldn’t it? And when it comes to good jokes, they don’t come any more hilarious than these...
tequila mockingbird! why do scuba divers always fall backward out of the boat? if they fell forward, they’d still be on the boat. i’ve got a joke about a tortilla but i think it might be a little too corny. why don’t they play poker in the jungle? too many cheetahs! what ...