One slow summer morning while I was working in the box office, two guys in suits walked up and asked to see the general manager. I radioed the GM, who came downstairs from his office. They stepped away and talked for a few minutes, and then the guys in suits handcuffed [Coworker] a...
In my busy dental surgery, I see several patients at the same time. As soon as I finish with one, I run to the next room to resume treatment on another. One day, I returned to a second patient without saying goodbye to the first. As my first patient was leaving, she gave a friend...
New day, same old debate. Maybe, just maybe, it’s a sign you should go for it. Read also: Bad Boss Memes that Will Make Your Day 16. Eye twitch The Interview Guys via Pinterest “Conceal, don’t feel. Don’t let them know!” 17. Busy day Officialworkmemes via Facebook Disclaime...
On the wedding day, when the minister came to the groom’s vows, he looked John in the eye and said, ‘Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life and swear eternally before God and your love...
I know they say that money talks, but all mine says is “Goodbye.” I have an inferiority complex, but it's not a very good one. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato. My wife and I laugh about how competitive we are. But I laugh more. My wife told me to stop im...
40. If your partner ran for office, what funny or embarrassing slogan would they use? Silly Questions to Ask Your Partner 41. What celebrity couple would we be if we were famous? 42. What TV show or movie would our lives be if it was a sitcom?
You need time to fully comprehend what’s happening. You need more time so that the idea that you’re leaving your home and saying goodbye to your friends can sink in properly. Unfortunately, time has suddenly turned into your relocation arch-enemy and you will have to prove your great org...
What percent of people say goodbye to their hotel room when they leave? I’m suspecting it’s over 50%. The biggest flaw in the English language is that “bi-weekly” means “twice a week” AND “every other week.” If I was an advertising creative on a toothpaste account, I would...
How do you say goodbye to a hotdog? Bun voyage. Report 9points POST #149 What do you call those dead pieces of green stuff left in the bottom of a bowl of Caesar salad? The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them. Report 9points POST #150 Two pickles fell out of th...
Yo mama so ugly even Hello Kitty said goodbye. Yo mama so ugly her memory foam mattress wishes it could forget. Yo mama so ugly she gave Freddy Kruger nightmares. Your mama so ugly she was an extra in Thriller. Yo momma so ugly she had to get you drunk before she could breastfeed ...