"I'm sorry if I frightened you. But when the beast got so tiresome I just went out the window. I think he thinks I'm in the bathroom, not that I give a damn what he thinks, the hell with him, he'll get tired, he'll go to sleep, my God he should, eight martinis before di...
Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that...your numbers not in it. 3663 965 2698 78 A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 real, 1 fake and he says to her " I will stop loving you when all the roses die" 5572 1479 4093 114 ...
Why? Because numbers are specific. When something is small, numbers tell. When something is big, numbers tell. When someone is a jerk, numbers tell. (Please forget the last sentence, but the first two are true). Therefore, to be surprising, all you have to do is build up people’s ...
Make a tune with your phone keypad numbers Dial the above number and speak to them Sing opera Practice your cartwheel skills Write an autobiography about your boss Play pranks on your friends Change the names on someones phone Bore someone with the words "I am bored!" Turn the volume of ...
“Just make up the numbers!” He had an affinity for fiction, as an English major at my alma mater. I had wanted to study English, too, but my mother vetoed English as impractical so I studied International Relations and Economics instead. I always envied English majors until I realized ...
11. Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other? Dill with it. 12.What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! 13. Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide. 14.Knock knock. ...
11. Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other? Dill with it. 12.What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! 13. Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide. 14.Knock knock. ...
Here are the best dad jokes guaranteed to get a big laugh in 2025. Yes, they are corny, bad and terrible, but that's why they're the best dad jokes.
Why do French people eat snails?Because they won't touch fast food. Report 15points POST #48 What do you call a fake noodle? An im-pasta. Report 15points POST #49 What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you? Slice to meet you. Report 15points POST Nicola...
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them. Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired. What did the grape do when he got stepped on? Nothing, but he let...